What to say; How to act

Hello wonderful people. I have been very overwhelmed and encouraged by the feedback and comments I have received from you. It has given me the hope, drive and courage to continue to share and inform as we lift the veil shrouding breast cancer and cancer in general.

A while back I wrote a post on what not to say to a cancer patient. I have included the link for a quick refresher. This post flips the script to offer us the right words to say and the right way to act.

When a friend or loved one receives the diagnosis, it is very important that you are there and you show that you care. The way you show care is to give them hope and strength by your words and actions. Let’s dive in and be well informed.

  1. We will face it together. This sentence shows that you have registered with the patient to duke it out with cancer from treatment to recovery. You are essentially saying, the patient is not alone and you will be there at critical points to assist.
  2. Here is the number to XXXXX Cancer Center. Give them a call. It is crucial that a cancer patient get a professional and thorough opinion about the diagnosis. We are not medically certified to diagnose and recommend treatment (unless you have a sister in law like mine who is an oncologist :)). Nudge the patient in the right direction. A gentle nudge. It is an overwhelming process. You want to be the gentle voice of reason.
  3. Here are links to healing scriptures or inspirational quotes on healing. Notice I did not tell you to refer the patient to a prayer mountain or your pastor. NEVER give any cancer patient false hopes about a spiritual cure from some fountain or mountain or object. The journey to healing requires a building up of faith. According to the Bible; faith is built by responding to the word of God, not seeking signs and wonders. I will be exploring this topic much later.
  4. I will help you with these house chores while you focus on treatment. Yass!! instead of saying “how can I help”, some house chores and errands you can help with include: cleaning, grocery shopping, school pick up and drop-offs if the patient has school age children, appointment rides, and cooking.
  5. I am here to listen. The emotional impact of a cancer diagnosis and treatment cannot be overstated. Personally, I am still reeling from the effects. By offering to listen, you are letting the cancer patient unload the emotional burden. Offer to go on a walk while the patient talks. It is highly therapeutic.

There you have it lovelies. Starting next month, I will be more thematic in my writing and focusing on one theme a month. This will guide my blogging and also allow for deeper discussions. I welcome your feedback. I appreciate your staying with me. See you in February.

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